Crazy Quotes

Looking back over my school forum's quotes page, I found a load of quotes which I had put up there and completely forgotten about. I thought I'd just share some of the best of my submissions to it...

Rich: Narcissistic...Isn't that where you have sex with dead people?

Abi having a self confessed blonde moment:
Abi: What date is it today?
Pete: [Looks at watch] Twenty-fifth.
Abi: Right. And what date was it yesterday?

Abi: Oh, mathematicians don't do maths. Doesn't mean it's not maths.
(She meant arithmetic in the middle, BTW)
Abi: You see, a-rith-MA-tic...oh no wait, that doesn't have maths in it.

Abi: What's that film, um...
Pete: Give us a clue?
Abi: Well it's about that maths genius who's insane...
Steve: Countdown?

Gam: I went to an all boy's school so I know how to castrate people.
Abi: I went to an all girl's school, and I don't!

Overheard between my mum and brother:
Mum: Dave, do you want chicken and mushroom or cheese and onion pie for dinner?
Dave: Um, does the cheese and onion one have meat in it?
Mum: No.
Dave: Then I'll have the one with meat in it.

Work Timetable - Weeks 7 and 8

Week 7

Day - Subject - Type - Time

Sun - Admin - Articles - 2h 45mins
Sun Total - 2h 45mins

Mon - Trusts - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Articles - 5h 15mins
Mon Total - 7h 15mins

Tue - Juris - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Articles - 4h 10mins
Tue Total - 5h 10mins

Wed - Admin - Articles - 4h 50mins
- Admin - Cases - 1h
Wed Total - 5h 50mins

Thur - Juris - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Lecture - 1h
- Trusts - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Articles - 2h
- Admin - Cases - 1h 20mins
- Admin - Essay - 2h 25mins
Thur Total - 8h 45mins

Fri - Admin - Class - 2h
- Admin - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Textbook - 6h
Fri Total - 9h

Sat - Land - Textbook - 50mins
- Land - Cases - 6h 45mins
Sat Total - 7h 35mins

Week 8

Day - Subject - Type - Time

Sun - Land - Cases - 2h 45mins
- Land - Articles - 1h 35mins
Sun Total - 4h 20mins

Mon - Trusts - Lecture - 2h
- Admin - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Articles - 3h 10mins
- Land - Revision - 1h
- Admin - Textbook - 1h 35mins
Mon Total - 8h 45mins

Tue - Juris - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Revision - 30mins
- Admin - Textbook - 4h 50mins
Tue Total - 6h 20mins

Wed - Land - Class - 1h 30mins
- Admin - Textbook - 3h
Wed Total - 4h 30mins

Thur - Land - Lecture - 1h
- Trusts - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Textbook - 1h 55mins
- Admin - Cases - 8h
Thur Total - 11h 55mins

Fri - Admin - Tutorial - 1h
- Admin - Lecture - 1h
- Essay - 30mins
Fri Total - 2h 30mins

Sat - Admin - Essay - 45mins
Sat Total - 45mins

Totals:

Admin Week 7 - 20h 15mins (+2h 25mins Essay)
Land Week 4 - 22h 35mins
Admin Week 8 - Pending
Week 7 Total - 46h 20mins
Week 8 Total - 39h 5mins

Last Day Errors

I'm back home now, ready for a holiday. However, I managed to make two somewhat foolish errors today which bear repeating:

Error 1: The Laundry

An error of almost Ming-esque proportions. Going somewhat against the trend of students, I always wash my clothes at the laundry in my halls of residence, rather than lugging it back for my mum to wash (seriously, the number of students who send a big load of washing home with their parents after a mid-term visit and take another with them at the end is quite high). So I fished out the mass of used clothes from under my bed and sorted them into white and colours. Finding out that I had three plastic bags' worth of colours and a total of two items white, I decided just to do the former. So I hefted them to the laundry and continued packing. 40 minutes later I returned to transfer them to the dryer. 30 minutes later I returned but, screwing up my plans, it had not been long enough to get them dried. I set them to 30 more minutes, and my parents arrived soon after that.

After getting all packed up into my mum's car and heading home, I was sitting on the couch with my feet up watching TV when...

Mum: So Pete, how much dirty laundry have you got for me?

[Pause, then Pete's eyes widen massively]

Pete: Oh crap!

This was followed by a dash upstairs and a hurried phonecall to Abi. Yes, I had left all that laundry back at college in the tumble dryer. Now it may not be a long way off but I had handed over my key, and did not fancy my chances getting it back. Luckily Abi was still there packing up, and she mercifully collected together all of the laundry for me. I suggested she put it behind the Lodge at college for me to collect but she preferred to take it home with her to bring when she visits. However, not too long later she and her mum showed up at my front door with all three bags, so I am not without clothes after all! Many many thanks Abi and Eleanor for saving me from that particular idiocy...

Error 2: The Curry

That evening we had a take away curry to celebrate my return. Now I am quite used to the 'medium hot' curry, but always tempted to try one step up. So when the curry place we used didn't have a medium veggie curry, I was not too put out to go to the 'fairly hot' vegetable madras. Mistake. I wolfed down perhaps a tenth of it before my mouth managed to scream at me to stop. It was just a little bit like swilling acid around my mouth, except without the relief of being able to spit it out. My tongue was bad but my lips were worse and my throat felt absolutely on fire, contracting and leaving me desperate for air. I managed to sort out that problem by gargling water - a lot. My dad took a couple of bites and then his eyes almost popped out of his sockets, so at least it wasn't just me! He wasn't quite able to enjoy his curry after that, and the rest of mine had to go. I also had a stomach ache for most of the night, so I think I've learned a lesson here - from now on in, it's mediums all the way.

Still, it's nice to be home!

Work Timetable - Weeks 5 and 6

You know, going through and changing the last timetable I could see just how similar this was to the one before... It's almost depressing. Still, I had my birthday at the end of this one, with a decent evening to go with it. Went to Freud's (restaurant) with a number of mates and then to G Bar, shedding friends on the way due to illness and tiredness. G Bar was very lame. And Gam kissed me. Egads. Still, somewhat better than last year...

Week 5

Day - Subject - Type - Time

Sun - Admin - Textbook - 2h 30mins
Sun Total - 2h 30mins

Mon - Trusts - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Textbook - 4h 5mins
Mon Total - 7h 5mins

Tue - Juris - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Cases / Articles - 2h 25mins
Tue Total - 3h 25mins

Wed - Admin - Cases - 6h 45mins
- Admin - Article - 45mins
Wed Total - 7h 30mins

Thur - Juris - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Lecture - 1h
- Trusts - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Revision - 1h
- Admin - Article - 1h 35mins
- Land - Textbook - 1h 50mins
- Admin - Essay - 2h 35mins
Thur Total - 10h

Fri - Admin - Tutorial - 1h
- Land - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Textbook - 4h 30mins
Fri Total - 7h 30mins

Sat - Land - Textbook - 55mins
- Land - Cases - 1h 5mins
Sat Total - 2h

Week 6

Day - Subject - Type - Time

Sun - Land - Cases - 5h 40mins
Sun Total - 5h 40mins

Mon - Trusts - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Articles - 2h 20mins
- Land - Revision - 45mins
- Land - Essay - 2h 10mins
- Admin - Cases - 2h 20mins
Mon Total - 10h 35mins

Tue - Juris - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Article - 2h
- Admin - Cases - 4h 35mins
Tue Total - 7h 35mins

Wed - Admin - Cases - 1h 40mins
Wed Total - 1h 40mins

Thur - Land - Lecture - 1h
- Trusts - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Cases - 7h 25mins
- Admin - Articles - 1h 35mins
Thur Total - 11h

Fri - Admin - Article - 1h
- Admin - Essay - 2h
- Admin - Tutorial - 1h
- Admin - Lecture - 1h
Fri Total - 5h

Totals:

Admin Week 5 - 19h 5mins (+2h 35mins Essay)
Land Week 3 - 17h 5mins (+2h 10mins Essay)
Admin Week 6 - 20h 35mins (+2h Essay)
Week 5 Total - 40h
Week 6 Total - 38h 20mins

Aborted Pancakes

A Pancake Day recipe (which we successfully made the first couple of attempts to make actual pancakes):

Requires:
Pancake stuff
Students

1. Attempt to make pancakes.
2. Fail.
3. Keep moving the pancakey mess that should have been a pancake around until it all looks vaguely cooked.
4. Drench in syrup (or jam for authenticity) and eat.

I will leave it to your imagination why they are called aborted pancakes...

Work Timetable - Weeks 3 and 4

Ah, weeks 3 and 4. At the end of these I mooted in a university-wide competition...and did not make it past the group stage, alas. Still, we were beaten by third years and it was good experience.

Week 3

Day - Subject - Type - Time

Sun - Admin - Textbook - 3h 40mins
Sun Total - 3h 40mins

Mon - Trusts - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Textbook - 4h
Mon Total - 7h

Tue - Juris - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Textbook - 1h
- Admin - Cases - 2h 30mins
Tue Total - 4h 30mins

Wed - Admin - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Cases - 5h 15mins
- Admin - Article - 1h 35mins
Wed Total - 7h 50mins

Thur - Juris - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Lecture - 1h
- Trusts - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Class - 1h
- Land - Textbook - 2h 45mins
Thur Total - 6h 45mins

Fri - Admin - Tutorial - 1h
- Admin - Essay - 2h 30mins
- Land - Textbook - 3h 20mins
Fri Total - 6h 50mins

Sat - Land - Textbook - 4h
Sat Total - 4h

Week 4

Day - Subject - Type - Time

Sun - Land - Textbook - 4h 10mins
- Land - Cases - 2h
Sun Total - 6h 10mins

Mon - Admin - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Cases - 4h 55mins
- Land - Essay - 1h 55mins
Mon Total - 8h 50mins

Tue - Juris - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Cases - 4h 55mins
Tue Total - 5h 55mins

Wed - Land - Tutorial - 1h
- Admin - Article - 25mins
- Admin - Cases - 4h 5mins
Wed Total - 5h 30mins

Thur - Juris - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Lecture - 1h
- Trusts - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Articles - 5h 30mins
- Admin - Cases - 2h 50mins
- Admin - Essay - 2h 5mins
Thur Total - 13h 25mins

Fri - Admin - Tutorial - 1h
Fri Total - 1h

Totals:

Admin Week 3 - 18h (+2h 30mins Essay)
Land Week 2 - 21h 10mins (+1h 55mins Essay)
Admin Week 4 - 17h 45mins (+2h 5mins Essay)
Week 3 Total - 40h 35mins
Week 4 Total - 40h 50mins

You Know You're a Law Student When...

Just a few. More when I think of them.

You know you're a law student when...

* You start pronouncing 'v' as 'and' in normal life. (This has happened perhaps irreperably to me. I saw a poster for Alien v Predator in a friend's room and mentioned it, unconsciously making the substitution. Luckily no-one was paying attention!)

* You start saying 'per' as a shorthand for 'as said by' or 'as evidenced by.' (A friend and I were discussing an essay and he made a point 'per our last tutorial.' I constantly back up arguments with 'per [insert academic / lecturer's name].') 'Per Lord Denning' becomes synonymous with 'this is a dodgy point of law.'

* On the subject of his lordship, your heart sinks automatically when you start reading a judgement which should be able to clarify a tricky point of law, only to find it prefaced by 'Lord Denning MR:' By the end of the estimed Master of the Rolls' summary of the facts, you have worked out who is going to win by who is presented in the positive light.

* More generally, your face lights up or sinks depending on which lawlord is making the leading judgement. (For me it's a beaming smile for Lord Millett, a slightly uncertain frown for Lord Browne-Wilkinson, an indulgent glance for Lord Diplock and an angry scowl for Lord Hoffmann).

* You start analysing events in terms of the interesting legal questions they bring up.

* You enjoy saying things like 'I am the law!' A lot.

Um...maybe it's just me.

Work Timetable - Weeks 1 and 2

It's a long time overdue, but that's the way it is at the moment. My other collection, in Tort, earned me a 67 mark so no problem there. I just have to work on memorising cases, as I seem to have the theory sorted. From below, I'm sure you can see just what my Thursdays are like!

Week 1

Day - Subject - Type - Time

Mon - Trusts - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Articles - 6h
Mon Total - 9h

Tue - Juris - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Article - 2h 20mins
Tue Total - 3h 20mins

Wed - Admin - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Article - 3h 55mins
- Admin - Textbook - 1h 35mins
Wed Total - 6h 30mins

Thur - Juris - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Lecture - 1h
- Trusts - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Class - 1h
- Admin - Articles - 3h 25mins
- Admin - Textbook - 2h 45mins
- Admin - Cases - 1h 15mins
- Admin - Essay - 2h 10mins
Thur Total - 14h 35mins

Fri - Admin - Tutorial - 1h
- Land - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Textbook - 2h 20mins
Fri Total - 4h 20mins

Sat - Land - Textbook - 1h 30mins
Sat Total - 1h 30mins

Week 2

Day - Subject - Type - Time

Sun - Land - Textbook - 3h 10mins
Sun Total - 3h 10mins

Mon - Trusts - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Textbook - 4h 15mins
- Land - Cases - 3h 30mins
- Land - Articles - 1h 20mins
- Land - Essay - 1h 40mins
Mon Total - 13h 45mins

Tue - Land - Cases - 3h 5mins
- Admin - Articles - 3h 15mins
Tue Total - 6h 20mins

Wed - Admin - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Tutorial - 1h
- Admin - Articles - 2h 55mins
- Admin - Textbook - 4h 45mins
Wed Total - 9h 40mins

Thur - Juris - Lecture - 1h
- Land - Lecture - 1h
- Trusts - Lecture - 1h
- Admin - Class - 1h
- Admin - Textbook - 2h 50mins
- Admin - Cases - 4h 30mins
- Admin - Article - 1h
- Admin - Essay - 2h 20mins
Thur Total - 14h 40mins

Fri - Admin - Class - 1h
Fri Total - 1h

Totals:

Admin Week 1 - 21h 15mins (+2h 10mins Essay)
Land Week 1 - 19h 10mins (+1h 40mins Essay)
Admin Week 2 - 19h 15mins (+2h 20mins Essay)
Week 1 Total - 39h 15mins
Week 2 Total - 48h 35mins

The Cartoons

It has to be done. I'll post more on the whole Mohammed cartoons controversy later but for now, they must be posted. Not because I necessarily agree with the messages conveyed. But people have died because of these images, and a political crisis has dominated. I believe people should know what the images in question are, at the very least. I had hoped the mainstream media would print them, as it would and should with other images causing this kind of controversy (whether aimed at muslims, christians, jews, atheists, whatever). As this has not happened however, here they are:

Image removed at the request of my parents. They were scared for my safety upon posting it.

Individual images are available here. Scroll down past the first set for clearer ones.

Work Timetable - Holiday and Week 0

Apologies to those who would prefer I desist with these posts. At least from now on I'll be doing two weeks in one, which should reduce the clutter somewhat. I have now received back my Trusts collection with a healthy 68 mark. Very pleasing indeed! Where a number is used after a subject it refers to the reading list week in which that topic appeared.

Holiday

Week - Subject - Type - Time

Week 2 - Contract 5 - Textbook - 1h 50mins
- Contract 8 - Textbook - 3h 45mins
Week 2 Total - 5h 35mins

Week 3 - Land Intro - Textbook - 2h 15mins
Week 3 Total - 2h 15mins

Week 4 - Land Intro - Textbook - 5h 35mins
Week 4 Total - 5h 35mins

Week 5 - Land Intro - Textbook - 1h 50mins
- Land Intro - Cases - 45mins
- Contract 8 - Textbook - 30mins
- Tort 1 - Revision - 2h 30mins
- Tort 2 - Revision - 3h 50mins
Week 5 Total - 9h 25mins

Week 0

Day - Subject - Type - Time

Mon - Tort 3 - Revision - 2h 30mins
- Tort 4 - Revision - 2h 15mins
Mon Total - 4h 45mins

Tue - Tort 4 - Revision - 15mins
- Tort 5 - Revision - 3h 30mins
- Tort 8 - Revision - 2h 30mins
- Trusts 1 - Revision - 1h 10mins
Tue Total - 7h 25mins

Wed - Trusts 2 - Revision - 2h 30mins
- Trusts 3 - Revision - 3h 5mins
Wed Total - 5h 35mins

Thur - Trusts 4 - Revision - 2h 30mins
- Trusts 6 - Revision - 1h 30mins
- Trusts 7 - Revision - 1h 5mins
- Tort - Revision - 30mins
Thur Total - 5h 35mins

Fri - Tort - Exam - 3h
- Trusts - Revision - 1h
- Trusts - Exam - 3h
Fri Total - 7h

Totals:

Land Intro - 10h 25mins
Tort Revision - 17h 50mins (+3h Exam)
Trusts Revision - 12h 50mins (+3h Exam)
Holiday Total - 22h 50mins
Week 0 Total - 30h 20mins